Saturday, April 07, 2007

JohnBull and RoseKate

I love watching Nigerian movies. My mom is an even bigger fan than I am… so it should come as no surprise that she has amassed a collection of about 250 movies over the past year or three. Of course more than half that number are in friends houses who ‘forget’ to return after borrowing them (cough *Naijadyme*)

For the past couple of years, I’ve had ‘Nollywood Ambition’. I’m not an actress per say but I know I can more than handle any ‘back from America’ or ‘dancing reggae in nightclub’ scenes. I have no taste for any ‘Igodo’ type stuff or anything that requires that I put on a traditional costume and fetch water or firewood. Oh no… yours truly just wants to be a ‘city actress’… I’m talking that ‘girls cot’ stuff… that ‘most wanted’ shit… afterall I can say ‘damn’ and ‘hey yo’ with the best of them.

Being the Nollywood enthusiast that I am, I of course have a couple of favourite actors and actresses:

  • John Okafor: I first watched this dude in ‘Mr. Ibu’ and got hooked on him. He’s so bloody hilarious… dude’s got ‘stupid’ on lockdown… I mean just looking at his face cracks me up… and when he opens his mouth… it’s over!
  • The two short rats/aki na ukwa/ 50 cent and busta rhymes: These two have been called every short adjective in the book. They’re always up to no good… and boy is it ever fun to watch. My favorite one is the lighter one(Osita).
  • Victor Osuagwu: This guy is funny for no damn reason. I loved him in ‘Adam goes to school’ and ‘Awilo Sharp Sharp’. I will watch absolutely anything he’s in even if all he did was walk up and down the street for 60 minutes.
  • Amaechi Muonagor: This guy’s belly, his voice.. everything about him is funny although I’m not quite sure he intends it to be.
  • Pete Edochie: is acting royalty to me… there’s so much elegance about him.. the things he says, the way he says the things he says… I have no words for this man… he is in a class all by himself.
  • Chinwetalu Agu: I just love this guy cos he’s always plotting a way to bring somebody down… and making midnight trips just to disturb someone else’s fortune.. lol… he’s amazingly funny without even attempting to be
  • Patience Ozokwor: The movie ‘mama G’ speaks for itself… lol.
  • Genevieve Nnaji: is the sexiest Nigerian actress there is in my opinion and homegirl can act her socks off
  • Stella Damasus Aboderin: beautiful inside and out… fantastic actress
  • Rita Dominic, Jennifer Eliogu and Bimbo Akintola: Gorgeous, eloquent, ‘about it’
  • Pat Attah and Chidi Mokeme: Nollywoods resident studs in my opinion… tall drinks of water… hot bitches for sure

The people I listed above… I will watch just about anything they’re in cos they’ve proven themselves time and time again… but Nkem Owoh… see Nkem Owoh used to be the shit back in the ‘pam pam’ and ‘osuofia in London’ days… but after a while, he started to loose it…

Maybe there was too much money coming in… maybe he was doing too many movies after each other… maybe they didn’t even write him a script and expected him to improvise on the spot…

Whatever it was, at one point or another during the past year or so… Nkem Owoh lost it…He started repeating jokes from movies past, talking out of point and rambling about unimportant stuff…

Remembering his glory in movies past, I gave him chance after chance… but he kept messing up, so with a heavy heart and 'tears in my eyes'… I took Nkem Owoh off my ‘favourites’ list.

But then, I went home last week and found a movie titled ‘JohnBull and Rosekate’ starring Nkem Owoh and a bunch of other people…

I would’ve passed it up… but the title of the movie was already a bloody laugh… who in their right mind names would name their own child ‘JohnBull’… couple that with the chance of him falling in love with a girl named ‘Rosekate’… this movie sounded too good to be true...

I mean I hadn’t even put in the movie and I was cracking myself up imagining possible children names for this couple… ‘Paul Ebenezer’, ‘Anthony Cattle’… ‘Underscore Lazarus’… lol… I just had to watch it

Premise: Nkem Owoh(John Bull) is a village shopkeeper with plans to marry Rosekate- a beautiful girl in his village when she graduates from secondary school. He continually showers Rosekate and her family with gifts, and with time, she begins to develop some feelings for him. Early in the movie, he travels to Gabon for business but doesn’t return till 10 years later.

Upon his return, Rosekate has become a medical doctor and to his chagrin… a nun. From this point on... comedy and chaos ensues. Nkem Owoh(Mr. John Bull) cracked me up with some of his comebacks when people tried make him resign himself to the fact that he couldn’t be with Rosekate anymore:

“You people have sacrificed my wife to the convent and you say it’s a blessing to the community. Why her? Your sister had 7 girls… why didn’t you tell her to sacrifice some of those girls to the community?”

“I should be happy that she has found Jesus? So are you saying that if she’s married to me.. Jesus will run away from her?” lmao

“Please don’t tell me this… I know the God I serve… he doesn’t snatch people’s wives”

“Rosekate, you sound like you’re afraid that probably God will get angry with you for removing your veil and marrying me. I serve the same living God and I can ask him to grant me this special request and I’m sure he will oblige me”

“Sister Rosekate, brother JohnBull still wants you to be his wife”

I’ve forgotten a lot of the other jokes… I mean you just had to see JohnBull's determination to get ‘sister rosekate’ to marry him… it was certainly fun to watch.

And you’ll be pleased to know that JohnBull did eventually get the girl…

So this is sort of a shout-out to Nkem Owoh:

Dear Mr. Owoh,

By being JohnBull, you have put yourself back on my favourites list. You should have a gulder and some suya tonight to celebrate cos this is a really big deal(trust me). Please don't mess it up.

Ps. You should totally do an Osuofia in London part 3

Your 'renewed' fan
Overwhelmed Naija Babe

40 comments:

Anonymous said...

First! Girl, i'm sorry about your guy as cliche as this might sound, everything happens for a reason- you grow through these experiences. You are a jewel- don't forget that. Hope your mom's feeling better.

azuka said...

I haven't been keeping up with Nigerian movies but the comedies do appeal to me in a way only funny Nigerian things can to a Nigerian.

Hmmm, Johnbull sounds like a blast. Have you seen 'One Dollar' (not Nkem Owoh)?

Ugo Daniels said...

FIRST!!!

wow, my gadgets are really working well. freaky thing beeped me awake immediately yu updated...lol

Now, lemme go and read post!

Ugo Daniels said...

Wonderfully presented, i must say.

Unfortunately, i don't watch 9ja movies. The few i'd managed to look into are just strictly comedies.

Happy Easter and do have a lovely day!

PS: where's my intial FIRST!!! post

dairy of a G said...

Sorry gurl I No clue About the Names

But I've seen a few Nigerian movies

like:
The King and I...Very good
Efficacy... Sandalous great ending

Maybe A few more Can't remember

Anonymous said...

glad to see you're alive,
its been a while since you've been around blogville

Anonymous said...

Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor Kimor

lol am BITCH am sorry

hope you're OK. Fogive me.

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@Anonymous: Ah congratulations on being first… yeah… I’m trying to see it that way… thanks angel… I appreciate your words… yeah mommy is so much better

@Azuka: oh you just have to watch this johnbull movie if you have the chance… it’s fantastic!!! I saw One dollar… that movie is a classic… with this one dollar I will buy this whole community… come to my daughters wedding… it’s an American wedding… the food you’re going to eat is from America… the water you’re going to drink is from America… I can already imagine my self in America… I mean I will just get my green card… then my red card… then my yellow card.. and of course… my black card… lol… don’t mind me… I’ve watched that movie so many times I can almost re-enact entire scenes… too much time on my hands eh

@Ugo Daniels: lol@gadgets… I like this your gadget oh… e get duplicate? Ah you should watch naija movies oh… they rock. This johnbull is a comedy… other great ones you should check out are ‘one dollar’, ‘adam goes to school’, ‘osuofia in london’, ‘mama G’, ‘awilo sharp sharp’, ‘two rats’… the list goes on… trust me I love me some Nigerian movies… Happy easter to you too angel… I promise… by next week I will check out your blog and many others… I’ve been out of it for a while… I’ll slide back in soon

@Diary of a G: Ahhh… you’re missing out my dear… I know I sound like an advertiser or something… but Nigerian movies are just the shiznit… The king and I sounds interesting but I have vague memories of Julia stiles in one oyibo movie like that… I think I have efficacy in my house right now… I’ll watch it tomorrow then and tell you how I like it…

@Anonymous: lol…that was a funny comment… but yes I’m alive oh… Glory be… you’re right.. I haven’t been making any blog rounds… but I will… soon…

@Anonymous: lol… you’re funny… it’s all good my dear…

Anonymous said...

glad to see its all good.
I knew I could get you to reply back.

I so look forward to all your posts

No more Unwelcome Surprises huh?

I swear I keep hoping He'll call

Or something. I miss you guys stories.

I check everyday hoping you'll re-unite

You tell it like nobody else

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@Anonymous: lol… you’re funny… yeah I’m gradually getting back into my blog life and life as I knew it… no more unwelcome surprises at this point… thank heavens for small miracles. He didn’t call… and I’m glad for that too… it’s funny cos before I thought I was ok you know… that I’d completely dealt with it… but a few things have happened over the past few days that made me realize that I haven’t… and that I can’t completely move on and just do me if I don’t let go of everything… the good the bad and the ugly… I can’t gloss it over… and I can’t dwell too deeply… this falling in and out of love shit sucks ass forreal… lol… I’m guessing you want gist that’s why you want me and kimor to get back… but if you read what he said and the way he acted last minute… you’d know that he’s not good for me anymore… that time has passed… but don’t worry sha… this blog wasn’t started because of Kimor… so it won’t end because of him… the show must go on!

Anonymous said...

the show must go on indeed

I'LL b front row centered watching

laughting cheering and apparently

feeling your pain along the way

cause lord knows it comes with the journey

Oh and please do tell about the few things that has happened to make you feel the way you do now

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@Anonymous: I will… nothing solid… just little things that are pointing me in a different direction than the one I was on… for the first time since we broke up… I cried last night… cos everything just hit me… too long to get into here… I gotta go sleep… I’ll probably write about it in my next post or something… thanks sha

chika said...

happy easter dear!just read your replies to anonymous about kimor.i feel you,it seems so hard to let go and sometimes you feel youd never get over him but the truth is that if you are sure he's not the one then you have to move on no matter how much it hurts.i love your spirt gurl and i totally agree with you that the show must go on even through the ups and downs.stay strong!

Daisy said...

Hey girl, I have slacked up on Blogsville for a while and did some catching up today. I'm so sorry about you and the boy... wasn't really expecting a break up.

I hope you are doing okay. It is well though, I'm sure you'll be just fine.

Just dropping a line and letting you know I'm thankful you're fine and your mummy's fine.

BABE PLUS said...

Gal,
u are really current, i bow for you.
All those stars i like but i dont like those Aki & Paw paw anymore.
They do the same freaking thing in every movie, i am actually tired of that plot.

Nice one sha, pls let me know of any new movie u come across , will go look out for that Johnbull.

Anonymous said...

WUP GIRL ITS ME FROM LAST NIGHT

DOING MY BLOG ROUNDS

I TOLD YOU I CHECK HERE ALL THE TIME

HOLLA BACK OR SOMETHING YOU KNOW

I'LL BE BACK SOON

OH WELL AM OFF LOOKING 4 SOME XCITEMENT N SOME LAUGHTS.

SEE YA

Ms zee said...

ask your egbon laspapi, he can hook you up with the nollywood runs....

Happy Easter baby.. I promise I would be back as soon as the Madness of finals is over...
Muahhhhxxxxxxx

You are sooo loved and appreciated...

nosa101 said...

hope you have an awesome easter

Naija Vixen said...

Awilo sharp sharp was a film!!!!but oda dan dat naija films are darn long oh...abeg let us knw wen u start acting in "Nollywood" oh...we want an interview with u too! ;-)

Orientatednaijababe said...

I am not a fan of naija movies, but i wonder how u managed to learn all those names.
Read most of your post from the past, gotta say u r cool girl. Hope ur mum is feeling better now.

kulutempa said...

happy easter, m'dear!

Bubbles said...

I love love love Nkem Owoh. I guess i haven't watched a lot of his movies so i never got tired of him. Glad u put him back on ur faves list, i think he's worth it.

Happy Easter

Spook E said...

that nnaji girl is the only reason i watch nigerian movies ;-)

vindication through innocence said...

lol!!this is jokes- im not too keen on nigerian films cos the last one i watched took sooo long- it had like a million cd's!!

Nigerican said...

happy Easter babe, i love the list.Check out Africandvd.com,u can suscribe and watch as many movies u want all day everyday.I too am a Naija wanna b star lmao, got my british and American accent down oh.Ciao bella.

chi said...

yo nice post
nd u can watch d movie free @ www.video.onlinenigeria.com
twas uploaded last week

Im A Babe said...

gurlll, i also lurv me SOME naija movies..the 'some' is in bold 4 a reason, cos lord knows i cant stand some nigerian movies either.
ur list of fave actors seems cool 2 but really victor osuagwu?, the ibu guy? dose 2 bore me 2 death!..the aki nd pawpaw guys r cool 2 but they stay repeating the same roles. where's ramsey nouah, nd RMD on ur list by the way? chidi is cool but the lisp thng he has goin on kinda irks me out sumtyms. pat attah....lets just say he can be a tall glass of fine boredom sometimes(Lol). there r sum other good naija actors nd actresses..my mind's kinda blank ryt now, i cant think. BUT they all need 2 watch out cos 1ce i step in...ild blow them all outta d water..TRUE TALK(LOL)...well genevieve myt be a lil hard 2 compete against sha(lol)

dairy of a G said...

wusup long legs,
thanks four stopping by my blog. those ya real legs four reel?
damnnnnnnnnnnn. i'll holla

Confessions of a Moody Crab said...

My dear...how u doing? Thanx for stopping by. Happy Easter too. I have alot of catching up to do on ur blog. Don't worry, when I hand in this annoying final year dissertation, I will come back to blogsville in full force!

Mr.Fineboy said...

LMAO!!! Men I love that dude. Didn't even know that was his real name...I've always just called hom Osuofia. The dude cracks me the hell up....especially when he goes, "look at you!" He is the man! Great post!

Anonymous said...

cant stand 9ja movies

Anonymous said...

Go gurl,

Way to come back and make everyone laugh their head off. I love this spin with comedy takes away all the moodiness on ur blog.

How are u doing? and how is ur moms? Take care of her okay, she's all u got.
Boys will come and go and yes I called them boys, cause grown men know how to act. Be well and yeah osuofia is a clown, I am a big fan anyday.

The Life of a Stranger called me said...

Overwhelmed, sweetness, ok, ermm can you lend the vid to me, I promise I will return it and not do a Naijadyme on you..LOL..

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@chika: Happy easter to you too angel… I’m dealing with it day by day and it gets better… thanks for the words sweetie… have a great week

@daisy: lol… yes you have slacked on blogsville but no worries I forgive you… hopefully you get back soon.. yeah me and kimor are done… but I’m still standing… thanks mami… I appreciate it

@babe plus: lol… I am current oh don’t try me sha… my mom can’t stand aki and pawpaw anymore but they both just kill me everytime… as in seriously I can’t imagine how they never knew each other all their lives but were both found in the industry about the same time… same height… and everything… it rocks! I’ll come back and recommend any good ones I watch later… you should see Girls cot though.. its not a comedy but dang was Genevieve looking hot in it

@Anonymous: lol… you sure do love you some blog reading…

@ms zee: lol… maybe… Happy easter to you too… I’ve missed you so much angel… hope you’re good sha… I feel you on the finals madness… cant wait for summer… oh shoot I still don’t have my 6-pack abs… lol

@Nosa101: easter was great… I hope yours was too’

@NaijaVixen: lol… awilo sharp sharp was the shiznit… sam loco efe was just a joker and victor osuagwu killed it! Kosi problem… I promise when I make it big(lol… notice I said when not if)… I’ll certainly grant you that interview… lol you just have to promise to write only nice things about me

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@orientatednaijababe: lol… I watch a lot of naija movies trust me… so I know so many of the actors and actresses… I gotta get you started cos trust me some of these movies have fantastic plots and are quite interesting… if you forgive the ankle boots and leather jackets these people sometimes wear to look ‘cool’… lol. Thanks for liking my blog… I’m not sure if I’ve been on yours yet or not… but I certainly will check you out(seeing as we have similar names and all)… yeah moms is good…. Hope you’re iite too and had a great weekend

@kulutempa: Happy easter to you too sunshine

@bubbles: lol… from the first day you started commenting on my blog I knew we’d both get along… when you say you love Nkem Owoh… I see why… lol. He rocks again! happy easter to you too angel

@spookE: lol… ahhhh… guys will always be guys.. whatever happened to great location, fantastic acting, superb direction… rad plots… none of that matters… only nnaji… I don’t blame you sha… she is a hottie

@vindication through innocence: you’re one of the blogs I’ve been meaning to check out… and I will… lol… yeah sometimes there are too many parts but hey that’s naija for you… everybody has to ‘eat’… and if they have to put in 5 slow motion sequences every 40 minutes to guarantee a part 2 or 3, what can we do about it? Lol

@Nigerican: happy easter luv… I remember you’re the original ‘making lists’ lady… lol… oh I hate watching movies on the computer for some strange reason… ahh… I can’t wait for your dream to come true as well… maybe we’ll both be in a movie together someday… bloggers paradise… whattttttttttttttttt… lol…I have to get a british accent though… got the Canadian down pat… I ’ve missed you sweetie… hope you’re iite

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@chi: thanks luv… I know about that online nigeria website… but I don’t really like going there cos I hate watching movies on the computer… thanks sha… I think I already told my best friend Naijadyme about it… not sure if she’s finished watching it or not
@I’m a babe: yay… a fellow naija movie lover… you rock! I think you’re one of the new bloggers I gotta check out too… babe abeg oh victor osuagwu rocks… as does mr. Ibu.. I can forgive you for not loving aki and pawpaw that much but victor and mr. Ibu… abeg change your mind oh. Ramsey nouah is growing bald… I’m tired of his british accent although he did do it for me back in the day… I completely forgot rmd when I made this list… but him and liz benson are just the shiznit.. maybe I’ll do another list sometime. I love chidi… he’s so tall(me I’m really tall so I’m always partial to tall guys) so I haven’t even noticed this lisp. Lol… babe I trust you sha… as I see your picture self I know say you no dey play… there’s room for many jare… no worry…
@diary of a G: lol… long legs that’s new… you’re welcome Canadian brother mine… I like your blog already… I’ll definitely be back there… yes oh my legs are for real… holla ke?… you’re a joker sha

@ confessions of a moody crab: I’m alright oh… I can’t wait for you to hand it in oh and come back to us oh.. you’ve been really missed

@Mr. Fineboy: this is the blogger my friend even called to tell me about … apparently you’re hilarious… I just haven’t had the chance to read you… so today… I will. I feel you though… everybody I know calls him osuofia… he’s back on my funny list so yes I like him again… thanks for stopping by

@Anonymous: lol… why now? What can we do to convince you now? Abi make we recommend some movies for you?

@anonymous: lol I didn’t really realize my blog has been moody lately… but I feel what you’re saying still… thanks for your words and for stopping by… I appreciate it.

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@The Life of a stranger: lol… you have to sign affidavit oh… are you ready?

יושה (Yosh) said...

hahaha, I like Amaechi Muonagor. He's just himself and whatever role he takes fits.

I think Aki and Ukwa are as overrated as u say Osuofia is, same as Mr. Ibu. Mr. Ibu's stupidity in movies knows no bounds and it's almost getting clichéd.

And I love Mama G so well, she fits, too. And in this order: Rita Dominic (those lips are to die for), and did you forget to mention Omotola J. Ekeinde, or you don't like her?

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@Yosh: I love Amaechi too… he just rocks!!! I love his belly… it makes me laugh all the time… lol. Aki and Ukwa me I sha like them oh… you should watch chinedu in games men play… fantastic acting… very funny too… Mr. Ibu’s stupidity is the precise reason I like him so much… he conveys so much in the lift of an eyebrow… loves it! Mama G is at the top of the ladder… Omotola… I don’t know… she’s a great actress but I never felt this overwhelming desire to watch everything she’s in… I don’t know… maybe that will change…

Idemili said...

Ha! You liked the 'JB and RK' film? My aunt came up from Nigeria recently and brought it and I thought it was absolute drivel. Some parts were funny but it gave me a headache with all the loose ends and...shit.