Thursday, February 15, 2007

Three’s Tag

I was tagged by Daddy’s girl who knows I absolutely love memes. So here goes:

Three things I do not want to experience:

1. What I did growing up… feeling alone, unwanted, incomplete, second-rate, discarded, unworthy, used, betrayed, unloved, a mistake… the list goes on
2. The concept/thought of my mother or sister going before I do…

3. A penis in my anus

Three people who make me laugh:
1. Me… See I figured that the only way your life will change is if you do it yourself. I do the weirdest accents, make the weirdest jokes, and even have the weirdest laugh. If you knew me… you’d laugh with (at?) me too…

2. My mother is a character... Drama Queen, Comedienne, person extraordinaire. I don’t think you could ever spend a day with her and not laugh. My sister is another funny person… I could never be angry around her if she doesn’t want me to be… I mean it could be just a sentence or a word or a laugh… and she’s got me. She more than anybody else in this world knows exactly what to say to get me giggling (probably cos she’s the person I’ve also spent the most time with in my world… we’ve been through just about every life experience together… she’s my heart). My Best Friend Naijadyme is another joker. Most people think she’s quiet the first time they meet her… but it’s all a façade. This babe has always has me laughing and in a good mood… because we make absolutely no sense together. My boyfriend brings out the best in me… he’s not really funny in the regular sense of the word although he does crack a joke or two… his comebacks to my jokes/insults are what will have you rolling on the floor… you won’t believe some of the stuff that comes out from my “omo jamo’s” mouth sometimes… lol.

3. Silly comedians… Ali G (Borat especially), Stephen Colbert, Basketmouth, Mr. Ibu, Nkem Owoh, Aki and Pawpaw, the dude from 'one dollar', 'adam goes to school', Jon Stewart, Mad Tv sketches especially Miss Swan (he luuku like a man… lol), Debra Wilson doing Oprah Winfrey and Whitney Houston… among others.

Three things I love:
1. God cos without him… I’d be in a psych ward or a social leper. He pulled me through.

2. My life and the people in it… my nuclear family, friends, boyfriend, blogfam, schoolfam.
3. Music… soothing, sensual, smart, sexy. There’s all that sort of Anita Baker, Celine Dion type of music… then there’s the rhythm in my heart… MAKOSSA (Awilo Longomba Style). I love fashion… the clothes, the endless stilettos and of course the never-ending foot rubs. I love the way I look when I wake up in the morning and the way I look right before I go to bed. I love the way I now smile with my eyes and my heart… and not just my lips. I love the way the little black dress drapes around my body and makes me look as good as I feel inside. I love the way he kisses me the moment he steps into my door. I love the way there’s almost always a song in my heart. I love the fact that I’m making peace with my world. I love the fact that I see beauty in simple things. I love the person that I’ve become and the little changes I’m making in my life every day. To cut a long story short… I love me.

Three things I hate:
1. Judgement: I hate when people assume attitudes of moral superiority and sit in judgement of others for things they have no control over or for the way they are. I also hate hypocrisy.
2. Ignorance: I don’t mean ‘not knowing’… I’m talking about when you just “don’t want/care to know”. This is especially when it’s about sensitive issues or things that affect/ bother me.
3. Betrayal: When I give my trust… it’s absolute… until you betray it… then it’s hard for me to go back to that same level.

Three things I don’t understand:

1. The plan of the universe
2. The man who fathered me
3. My feelings about the man who fathered me

Three things on my desk:
1. A glass of water
2. Cereal… I tried a new one this week… muesli(x?)… the nuts in it are great… but it goes down like a ‘performance athlete’s cereal’… so once the box is done, I’m going straight back to my Woodland Berry Granola Cereal which rocks the socks off anything else out there right now... in my opinion at least.
3. Two empty bottles of Champagne

Three things I’m doing right now:
1. I’ve got to finish typing this up and leave my house in the next 30 minutes
2. Looking for my toothbrush
3. Checking my voicemail and listening to Michael Buble who sings the soundtrack of my life… right
My Jolene?

Three things I want to do before I die:

1. Accomplish every goal I ever had… 6pack abs, a mansion on every continent, be established in a great profession, keep my mom in complete luxury… no lifting a finger before noon, a fantastic family (husband? Kids?)… in no particular order.
2. Go shoe and bracelet shopping in every country in the world.

3. Be completely happy and at peace with myself and convince God to keep me a place in heaven.

Three things I can do:
1. Laugh, love and live with the best of them

2. Dance Makossa like it’s going out of style
3. Make great Jollof rice and potato porridge.

Three things you should listen to:

1. Sade, John Legend, Michael Buble, Christina Aguilera, Anita Baker, Dolly Parton, India Arie, Heather Headley, Robin Thicke, Celine Dion, Cher, Corinne Bailey Rae, Keith Urban, Amy Winehouse, Dixie Chicks, Leann Womack, Imogen Heap, Awilo Longomba, Oliver D Coque, Lagbaja’s Konko below(more like dance to).

2. The opinions of people who truly care about you… they usually mean well. Don’t gotta do it… but listen at least.
3. Your heart

Three things you should never listen to:
1. The people try to tell you you’re not good enough the way you are.
2. Japanese Soca (yes it does exist… and yes, it is as bad as you think it is)
3. False prophets… prophets of doom

Three things I’d like to learn:
1. The quickest way to get 6-pack abs.
2. To become a better writer, person, lover (although I am pretty good at that…lol).
3. To bargain in French, to salsa properly, to love ackee and saltfish.

Three beverages I drink regularly:
1. Cranberry Juice… and it’s other variations… Cranberry Vodkas, Cranberry Daquiris… etc
2. Water, Milk…
3. Fish peppersoup(which my mom makes amazingly well), Cream of mushroom soup… lol… they’re not quite beverages are they?

Three TV shows I watched on NTA as a kid:
I don’t remember watching a lot of tv in Nigeria… I was too busy ‘not being a kid’. So I’ll write the few things I remember watching in England:

1. Neighbours… Australian soap opera I think
2. Kylie Minogue’s “Locomotion” music video
3. Michael Jackson’s “Thriller”… I used to do the splits amazing well back then…and street skate… what happened? Lagos… that’s what happened!

Three Books I read as a kid:
1. Sweet Valley High Stuff… Jessica and Elizabeth Wakefield (j’adore Jessica… I always love the more selfish friend/sister in any given movie or book… like Tony Childs in girlfriends, Karen Walker in Will and Grace… the list goes on).
2. Mills and Boon, Harlequin stuff, Silhouette romance novels… I started reading them at 11 or 12. Looking back I don’t think I understood a lot of what I was reading… lol.
3. Those ‘song lyric’ books in Nigeria… the ones that gave you terrible interpretations of Jennifer Lopez or Celine Dion’s new hit songs… lol… that was fun in high school.

I hereby tag anybody who’s ever watched a Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera music video… and thought… hmmm… sexy. I also tag anybody who’s ever watched an usher video and thought… 6-pack CHECK, great singing voice CHECK, fantastic dance moves CHECK, cute face with a little strange nose… CHECK! If none of the above apply, then I tag you if you drank water today!!!


Eagle's Nest!!! said...


Mari said...

lol... i can't be tagged coz i haven't had water today and nope i haven't seen brit, xtina or usher. 8-)

azuka said...

And I just got a bottle of water. I'm not going to drink it.

vindication through inocence said...

lol!!'a penis in my ass'-this is some funny ish.ive always wondered, if you do it up the bum, where odes the poo go to??does it get pushed up?-sidetrackin....

japanese soca!!!as in you need to send me a link for the sturvvs!!lol!!rotf apml(roll on the floor and piss myself laughin!)joker!!

Naijadude said...

Infact I was gonna go get some water, just like Azuka, I will pass , I will be fine!

Freaky Deaky said...

Wow you're trying to tag everyone aren't you? I think I've done this one before so I guess I get a pass.

Kpakpando said...

It's like God knew...I drank tea all morning. It does not taste good with meatpies, and together they make a horrible breakfast.

Naija Vixen said...

Sweet Valleys!!!*tears streamn down face...nostalgia"...for the fact that you luv Karen Walker,i will luvv u forever...or sumthin...dont get scared;-)britney and xtina?who are they?dont do water dahling!;-)

Naija Vixen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
tiwalade said...

I swear I like u cuz u dream big...",no lifting a finger before noon"
Ole,u dont want to work ehn? dont you know too much of doing that will lead to becoming a couch potato!...

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@Eagle’s Nest: Thank…

@Mari: Lol… I know before the end of the day… that story is going to change oh… so I’m expecting a tag in the next few days!

@Azuka: lol… I give you 5 hours

@Vindication: lol… I no go fit answer the question as I never do before sha… but your imagination self… lol. I don’t have any of the Japanese soca my dear… na my old housemate oh.. she was Japanese and no kind nonsense when I no carry my ear hear man… even Japanese hip-hop no too good.. but Japanese Soca is just a travesty!!!lol… I already like the sound of you… I dey go your blog

@Naijadude: I emailed you… let me know if you still want me to do that thing you asked me to do… I got it too late… so I don’t know if it’s still relevant to you. You go do am oh… no story!

@Freaky Deaky: lol… that’s the idea. Oh ok… this time… no problem… but you gotta do the next tag!

@Kpakpando: lol… the day is not done yet oh… meatpie for breakfast… babe you dey gbadun sha… that kind proteinous breakfast for sweet oh…

@NaijaVixen: Don’t you just love those novels… hehe… I think we have a mutual appreciation club… I think you’re my new cybersister… yay!!! Lol… I know you know them oh… so I’m expecting a tag on your blog as soon as possible!

@Tiwalade: lol… shebi I can dream oh… lol

Favoured Girl said...

Oops I drank water today, oh no!

Henry said...

lmao @ 'song lyric' books!!! ahh, memories...

LondonBuki said...

LOL, I guess I've been tagged! LOL!

Nice one!

Naija Sapphire said...

That was very cool. Dang, you tagged me more than once. I don't know who sent me to go and watch Usher's movie this afternoon and after all my days of drinking coke like fish, today i wanted to feel a little fit and i drank my last gulp just before i put on my computer. ONB, you'll pay, lol.

I miss SVH and SVU - loved them totally. I'll do mine in like 30 mins

Vera Ezimora said...

lol @ Usher's strange nose. I've always felt the same way, my dear. I've always looked @ the nose and wondered....

lol @ not having a penis in ur anus. I feel u jo. That's just wrong on so many levels!

stranger said...

my internet access has been unstable recently so i have fallen behind on your blog...i just wanted to say thank you for sharing your life. in some way, you have touched mine with your colors, and given me a perspective i never had. i hope in some small way too, i have given you a perspective to explore...after everything, only one question counts...only one audience matters...God is still wooing...PS: when will u get to leave me a comment on my blog?

Jaycee said...

ONB...I hate all those things u detest as well...

Geez, guess what? I had CEREAL on my table too when I was doing my own meme...he he (thats funny). Are u joining the cereal club?

...SWEET VALLEY was in heaven when I read those. Sometimes, they will even appear as if they were REAL people in my dreams...Jessica the bubbler and Elizabeth the nerd...and the different guys and different heart troubles. I loved me some Elizabeth. She was capable of anything, but people often limited her PROWRESS.

Loll..cheers dear...

angie said...

Who is Usher,Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera. Water??haven't had dat since i was born...i live on palm wine
U reali want a six-pack??

omohemi Benson said...

Nice meme,
I also read the sweet valley high series,aboslutely beautiful.

UnNaked Soul said...

this one wey i don drink reach 5litres of water today already (still get like 4 more litres to go)... so I may have to do it after I wake up from my 6hrs nap... *wink*

The Life of a Stranger called me said...

YOur meme really was funny - and I will have to bow out pls. All this water talk!!!!!