Tuesday, October 31, 2006

To My Favorite Soccer Player

You are one hot bitch!

I just wanna grab your bow-legs from behind and topple you on my couch

I wanna see your eyes widen as I ride you like a brokeback donkey

You are walking sex!!

Everytime you kick that ball, you kickstart my pulse

Everytime you net, you make me wet!!!

You make me want to do freaky things with you and that ball

I want you to balance the ball with one hand and slightly spank me with the other

I want to be your cheerleader!!!!

I just wanna shake my bon-bons while you bounce your ball on my walls

Please let me be on your team… Captain!!!!!

Make me do ‘missionary push-ups’

Suicides all night longggggggggggg

You are a short thing, but if I played for you… I’d stretch you to the limit!!!!!!

I just want to put some knee-pads on those bow-legs and do a bedroom practice play

Just put the ball on the headrest right before we go for another round of "who’s my baller?"

I wanna give you a boner while you run midfield

I would love to sing your national anthem in your arena!!!!!!!

Please don’t scream my name

I just want you to yell "NET" or "SCORE" everytime I hit that spot!!!!!!!!

I want you wearing nothing but your Jersey.


My name is Overwhelmed Naija Babe and I’m Your Number One Fan!!!!!!!!!

35 comments:

Reen said...

yay am first!!!

oh my... am speechless oooooo who is this soccer player that wants to make u shake ur bon-bons lol

Patrice said...

To My Favorite Fan

You're the cutest thing
That I ever did see
I really love your peaches
Want to shake your tree

lol

Always a joy to read your posts

P.S. From the Steve Miller Band song "The Joker"

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@reen: lol.. CONGRATULATIONS @ BEING THE FIRST READER>>> i suppose give you special reader award oh...(wats ur desire mami?)... don't be speechless oh... that was straight from the heart... lol.. who'd u think it is?

@patrice: lmao... imma limewire that song quickfast cos i'm liking the idea of this steve miller band already (they seem to get it!.. and so do u!!!... lol)Thanks for stopping by

reen said...

lol thanx for the award! still tryna figure out who this soccer player is....can i get a clue/hint pweese

Angie said...

lol....who is this lucky soccer player???
my eyes almost popped out wen i saw this post. i thot is was going to be the usual praises for players...girl, u r something else!!!
So who is HE/HER(lol)??

Anonymous said...

babe you are totally feeling the leftovers from my 'ode to justin'.. lol.. does yo man know about this? huh?? lol

lotus said...

penitrating imagination,sharp
LIFE has no goalpost,no net,no ball
only the the playground remains
one can play at anytime...........
without a partner

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@reen: lmao...he plays soccer!!!

@Angie:wow.. y'all really wanna know?!?!?! lol

@JadedKiss: lol.. totally. i read that ode to justin and the first thing that came to mind was my 'favorite soccer player'. I just had to give him a shoutout... lmao.. nah he doesn't know yet... but he will.. haha... I'm sure he likes him some ciara or beyonce.. so we should be even (I think... lol)

@lotus: hmmm... I've read your comment a couple times and I'm not completely sure I understand it.. babe explain further abeg

azuka said...

What the...? I can't believe you like bow legs?

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@Azuka: oh wow.. I could write 5 blog entries that detail my love for bow-legs... they are just soooooo sexy.. you have no idea!!! The curve, The Shape... in fact please don't get me started!!! That's probably one of the main reasons I love soccer players cos a lot of them have bow-legs(cos who really understands the game anyways.. what with its penaltys and high kicks or jumps or whatever you calls those plays/passes)

Eagle's Nest!!! said...

Are you a Poet, OWNB? Your imagination is something else. And who is this soccer player you wanna ride like brokeback donkey?

Eagle's Nest!!! said...

Are you a Poet, OWNB? Your imagination is something else. And who is this soccer player you wanna ride like brokeback donkey?

Noni Moss said...

Lolll he's short so he cant be David Beckham, whom I would do in a heartbeat.

Aaawww is it your man? (you said he plays soccer)

As for bow legs - it didn't really do anything for me till I saw Jensen Ackles strutting in supernatural - hubba hubba!!

Anonymous said...

OWNB, you are a talented poet o...

Anonymous said...

exactly.. is it your man? if it is you're not even and HE's in trouble oh!! lol.

temmy said...

who are you talking about jare. I have a crush on a footballer as well. Infact his name is the password to a lot of my details. SO dont ask me to give his name.lol.

Hint: which country does he play for?

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@Joel: Poet ke? lol... I wouldnt exactly say that.. but thanks babe...

@Noni Moss: Lol.. David Beckham is a sexy bitch... but its not him.. lol.. my man is tall and I already do 'ride him like a brokeback donkey'.. so its not him.. lmao. Hint 1: He's BRAZILIAN!!!

@Daddy's Girl: lol.. thanks babe.. luvs ur blog!!!

@JadedKiss: lol.. nah the boyfriend is taller than me... Hint 2: He just retired after Brazil was eliminated in the Quarter Finals... remember he's short!!

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@temmy: lmao... SO ur a soccer-player-lover" too? What about em does it 4 u? lol... so i won't ask then so i don't figure out the password 2 ur safety deposit box and go and retrieve that your diamond necklace that u were planning 2 give 2 ur first daughter! oh HE'S BRAZILIAN!!!

nosa101 said...

I play soccer too

*whistle*

NaijaBloke said...

OWN ..I rest my case ... thatz all I can say ..

Hope u wont make some rugrats this winter cos at the speed u r going ..u might ..LOL

NaijaBloke said...

And ur soccer player is Roberto Carlos right?

Vickii said...

Hun, please don't tell me it's Ronaldo because I will seriously question your taste/sanity/everything I have ever thought about you!!! Ronaldo is brazillian right?

Thierry Henri, Zidane, Joe Cole ... my hottest players! Shame I only watch football once every four years when the world cup is on!

Naijadude said...

Hmm this is intense, apparently someone is not doing the job well thats why you are seeking a soccer player. I thought they said Jamaicans are great ni!!! :D

Mari said...

lol@ naijadude's comment.

Nice post girlie! He's Brazillian...hmmm would it be Ronaldinho? I bet it is. He's got some bow-ish looking legs.

zaiprincesa said...

YE KPA!!!>>YOU THIS FREAK!!!..lol.IM A BOW LEGGED MAN LOVER TOO OH!!..Yummy...almost as good as a hot fudge sundae...hmm..maybe even better..Nothing sexier than a man with bow legs...leaves me wondering what kind of sandwich he is..lol

Anonymous said...

i don't know nuffin about soccer players but all i have to say btw i think u know already but "don't stop get it , get it.Ride u're broke back donkey till u can ride no more" lol gosh u really bring out the worst in me .Now i gotta go say some hail Mary's *roll eyes @ u* . GREAT BLOG :).

broccolimakesmepuke said...

After reading this, I'm sure he'll become your number one fan too!

Poetic Justice said...

NAUGHTY!

The Mistress said...

LMFAO @ "You are walking sex."

Fuckin' love it!

Uzo said...

Oh please dont tell me its Ronaldo because it would be such a let down from the high of these words....

Anonymous said...

LAWD!!!

The Life of a Stranger called me said...

Huh - you've lost me - so who is it - is he married - what team does he play for? - what colour jersey does he wear? -

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@nosa: lmao… is that so?!?!?!

@NaijaBloke: lmao… I no do anything oh… just have an active imagination?!?!?... lol.. yes sir… THE ONE AND ONLY ROBERTO CARLOS!!!

@1982: Lol… hell nah@Ronaldo... Its my Roberto oh… that dude’s bowlegs just rev my engine everytime… Zidane is a sexy bitch.. lol me.. I confess oh.. I’m a world cup soccer watcher only… the only other times I watch is not for scores/ fave team/that similar nonsense.. just for bow-legged sexpots!!! Lol.

@Naijadude: lmao… U know the boyfriend is hitting it perfect now… the write-up was a lil fantasy brought on by a lil horniness (I hadn’t seen the boyfriend in about a week and a half and my hormones were raging… didn’t wanna put him out there so I just wrote about the soccer player instead… but rest assured that everything I said I’d do to Roberto Carlos… I did to the boyfriend last night(remember I was even talking to u b4 he came ova)… just without the ball, net or the scores!!!... oh and I did a little strip-tease that I gotta tell u about later… hehe)… lmao.. I just got a great idea… Maybe I should do some role-playing with the boyfriend and he could be Roberto and that’d satisfy my curiousity once and for-fucking-all!!! Lol… but I don’t even wanna know who he’d want me to be for his fantasy??? Ashanti (I got the bow-legs for that) Beyonce (I got the hair for it) Pamela Anderson (I got the ummmmm…. Canadian for that?!?!.. lol)… luv u babe!

@Mari: no mind naijadude jare… ROBERTO CARLOS FOR LIFE… Ronaldinho no too fine like that sha…

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

@zaiprincesa:yay!!! Ur in the club!!! Bad bad girl u are… lmao… Bow legs are just UHHH… I just wanna UHHHH.. lol.. abeg don’t get me started.. BAD GIRL!!!

@Nigerican: lmao… another BAD GIRL!!! And I thought I was the only one with these thoughts!!! I dey go pray self… cos that was steamy… hehe… U know I luv ur blog too!!!

@broccoli: lol…he would be… wouldn’t he?

@Poetic Justice: lol… I aim to please!

@The Mistress: lol… Thanks babe… ABSOLUTELY_FUCKING_LUV_UR_BLOG… ur the SHIT!!!

@Uzo: lol… no oh… NOT RONALDO>> ROBERTO!!!!!!! ROBERTO IS THE NEW ICE CREAM!!!

@Olawunmi: lmao… I no go comment for this comment cos I already know what you’re thinking… hehe

@The life: ROBERTO MY SUNSHINE!!! REAL MADRID BABY!!! I don’t know or care if he’s married jare.. in my fantasy he’s single, wearing only his jersey and practicing some free kicks on my bed… don’t want any intrusions!!!... lmao

Icy said...

hahahahahahahah Talk about serious passion... hahahahah